Sunday, August 9, 2009

Downside

There's some downside to having a blog like this.

I've thought about it a lot over the past couple days because I'd really like to meet someone but I'm afraid to do it. We've talked for a long time. He doesn't live far away...we've chatted online, traded messages, and even talked on the phone several times. He's really hot, obviously, and I'd love to fuck him. I think he'd give an inch of his cock or more to have me fuck him...and better than that, he actually wants me to use him however I see fit, and let anyone I want do the same. That kind of stuff turns me on. ;-) I'd whore a hot boy out left and right...and probably lick the loads out of his hole.

Anyway, I have a hard time bringing myself to meet guys who are in any way connected to this blog. To make my point, I actually had to quickly click out of this window to talk to my roommate. Since he's gay and a subject of this blog, he'd be quite interested in reading it, and he'd probably never talk to me again if he did.

I can say that about way too many of the guys who I've written about. I don't really want them to know...and I certainly don't want to walk into a club and have guys whisper, "That's the guy who fucks everyone bare and writes about it on the internet."

Since gay boys are pretty big gossip whores, you all will probably agree that I just described exactly what would happen.

That's why I've never allowed the blog to intersect with my real life. I've hidden my name, pictures, and other personal information away...I change some of the details of events in my stories around in order to protect myself. It really sucks to some extent.

Meeting someone who knows about the blog is taking a risk. It requires 100% trust and 100% certainty that I'm not going to get hurt as a result.

So I'm sorry for dragging my feet. I'd really like to meet you and show you the time of your life...and maybe someday it will happen. I really wish you understood.

Am I more paranoid than I need to be? Yeah, I am. All you really need to throw my life into chaos is a 100% accuate description--a tattoo I might have, a birthmark somewhere, which way my cock points when it's hard, who knows! And that's better than being sloppy...because the last thing I need is every gay guy in this town buzzing about who I am and what I've been up to. For every boy who thought it was hot and wanted me to fuck him, I'm sure there'd be several who didn't. I never want to see that happen!

In a perfect world no one would ever judge me for fucking boys, there would be no STDs, and there would be no consequences to writing about my raunchy college encounters. That would be a pretty fun world, but for now I guess I'll just have to stick to reality.

I'll work on my trust. There's no downside to talking...you never know what could happen. Just never expect it and never see it as a certain thing. Don't get your hopes up or your heart broken.

6 comments:

  1. Hey RCJS - thanks for sharing the awkward dilema of being public about such personal things. I appreciate your writings, enjoy your hot adventures, and heartliy support your efforts to remain anonymous. There's an old saying that three can keep a secret if two of them are dead. Now please go be a cumslut and report back. :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Dear RCJS:

    So, delete the blog already, fuck the guy, start a new blog,(we'll find you)and keep telling us about your adventures, we love it.The gossips will be foiled, at least temporarily, trust is no longer an issue, and everyone, most importantly us, gets what they want! win/win!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I definitely agree with second anonymous. Fuck the little cum slut, start a new blog, write about it, and be done with it. He sounds like he needs the load(s).

    ReplyDelete
  4. Wow, what a hypocrite you are. You want to be able to risk your life and the lives of others on a regular basis (if we can believe this blog), but you don't want to be "talked about". Poor baby. It's the internet; sooner or later, someone will find out. Just imagine how much worse you'll feel if they find out once you've contracted HIV and hepatitis.

    ReplyDelete
  5. The fact of the matter is that no-one is completely trustworthy--not you, not me, not anyone else. You obviously take huge risks with your life, so it's kinda ironic that you're scared to take the "trust" risk. But I understand it because your take on what could happen is realistic... But if you wait for someone to "trust completely" you will be waiting the rest of your life.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Everyone I fuck knows what they're getting into. There are no lies and no illusions. They come quite willingly and typically beg for cum...so I don't feel sorry for them if something happens to me or to them. We deserve what comes.

    ReplyDelete